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After your Father’s Day cards are opened

Sunday, June 21, 2009, 2:04 pm |

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 NLT

How successful a father are you? Take this online test from the National Center for Fathering.

I give the highest human honor to fathers. Like the general of an army or the captain of a ship, fathers are the most important person in the family unit. They are the leaders, whether they know it or not!

Dads are the anchor for the children. Dads are bigger, stronger, louder and have the ability to be the most decisive and active parent. It’s the male distinctive.

When I meet a couple or a family, I first address the father, look him in the eye, and talk with him. I honor him as the captain of his children’s hearts. He will steer them well or not well or disastrously. To steer them well, he needs to intentionally love and lead, train and teach. To steer them badly, he doesn’t need to lift a finger. Such is the power of a father.

Dad, I want to remind you of something important. Basically, I want to remind you of your purpose. Receiving cards and words of appreciation on Father’s Day is one thing. But it’s entirely another thing to be a good father who trains good character in your children.

It’s a fact that today’s generation is the worst morally that America has ever had. From back-talking to self-indulgence to lack of empathy to addictions to food, pre-marital sexual activity, video games, music, internet chat rooms, gambling, alcohol and drugs, today’s teens are setting records in immorality and self-destructiveness. Yes, even in “Christian” families.

Bill Gothard, founder of the Institute in Basic Life Principles has said, “What the parents allow in moderation, the children will allow in excess.”

So if parents live close to the cliff, their children will fall over the cliff. Conversely, if parents consistently try to avoid sin and love God, their children will do an even better job avoiding sin and loving God.

America needs the next generation to be much better, don’t you agree? For if America doesn’t repent of its sins — beginning with you and me in our homes — God will hold us all responsible. We may already be seeing His hand of punishment.

Dad, here’s your assignment if you choose to accept it:

It’s time for courage. For conviction. For faith. To secure and inspire your children, you need to constantly grow as a father. You need to understand your role. It’s to be the main trainer of your children’s character and behavior.

Deep down, you are needed to quench the deep thirst that your child has for you. An unmet father-thirst is why boys join gangs and girls hook up with older men. Give your children the “father water” they thirst for. Become a highly functional father who leaves a legacy with your children that makes them and our society better, not worse.

Dad, I challenge you to make becoming a better father your desire, your plan, and your new lifestyle. Commit to grow in this way, then tell your wife your plan and ask for her support. If you say you love your kids, your growth as a father isn’t an option, it’s an imperative. How do you grow? You first start by shrinking yourself.

A good father is a man who is in control of his home with the positive strength and love of God. He has a committed relationship with God. He reads the Bible with his family and prays with them. He is living out his faith, not contradicting it, as his children watch and learn. This is how to have peace and respect in your home.

How do you become a functional father? And how do you grow from being a functional father to a highly functional father who receives the praise of God, his wife and his children, and leaves a measurable legacy?

Get resources and training from the National Center for Fathering. A good first step is to take a simple test that will tell you how you’re doing as a father.

Be courageous. Be loving. Remember, this isn’t about your feelings. It’s about your children’s hearts, minds and futures. Change yourself…to build your kids…to become what they were created to be…adults of impeccable character…who love and serve the Lord.

What kind of father are you? Take this online test from the National Center for Fathering.

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse. Malachi 4:6 NIV

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